Consider a common scenario: you find a $20 bill on the sidewalk. You could keep it, considering it an easy windfall, or return it to its rightful owner. The decision is straightforward, yet for many, the unmade choice leaves a nagging feeling. There’s no physical weight from holding onto the money, but there is a mental burden of not knowing whether you acted with integrity or convenience.
This scenario extends beyond monetary matters. Think about a colleague who is struggling with a project and has asked for help, but you have not offered assistance. The decision to lend a hand might seem minor in the grand scheme of things, yet the unmade choice can weigh on your conscience. You may wonder if your refusal could be holding back someone’s career advancement or causing undue stress.
The weight of unmade choices is not always negative. Sometimes, it comes from making a choice but leaving important details unresolved. You might decide to buy a new car but keep postponing the test drive and the paperwork. The decision to purchase the vehicle feels complete in your mind, but the tasks associated with it remain undone. This creates a sense of unfulfilled obligation that can linger.
Another example is when you choose to volunteer at a local charity. You feel good about making this choice, but there are unmade decisions along the way—like not following up on scheduling commitments or not communicating effectively with team members. These unresolved details add to the weight of the unmade choices, creating a feeling of guilt for not fully committing.
Honesty and responsibility are central themes when discussing the weight of unmade choices. Honesty requires us to be truthful about our intentions and actions. When we make a choice but fail to follow through, we deceive ourselves and others. The more significant the decision, the harder it is to justify our inaction. If you decide to start a savings plan for retirement but never set up automatic transfers, the weight of that unmade choice can grow over time.
Responsibility involves taking care not only of what we say but also of what we fail to do. Many people feel responsible for their actions, yet they often overlook the importance of following through with their intentions. This is particularly true when it comes to commitments we make to others and ourselves. If you promise your friend that you will help them move next weekend, failing to show up not only breaks the trust but also burdens you with a sense of guilt and responsibility.
Integrity plays a crucial role in managing unmade choices as well. Integrity involves acting in accordance with one’s values and principles. When we encounter situations where our actions do not align with our stated values, the weight of unmade choices can be particularly heavy. If you value honesty but find yourself avoiding difficult conversations at work, the weight of those unmade choices can build up over time.
Sometimes, convenience overrides principle when making decisions. In these cases, we may choose an easier path that feels less burdensome in the moment but leaves us with a sense of unease. If you decide to take the easy route and skip going to the gym instead of following your commitment to exercise regularly, this unmade choice can weigh on you as you reflect on what you are sacrificing for short-term ease.
The weight of unmade choices is not always visible; it is often felt more through the internal dialogue we have with ourselves. This self-dialogue can be a constant reminder of the decisions that could have been made but were not. It can create a sense of stagnation and regret, making us feel as though we are missing out on opportunities or failing to live up to our potential.
Reflecting on these unmade choices helps us recognize the importance of following through with our intentions. It is easy to get caught up in the day-to-day demands of life, but taking a moment to evaluate our decisions and commitments can be transformative. By doing so, we can address any unresolved issues and alleviate the weight that comes from leaving choices unfinished.
The weight of unmade choices is a reminder of our capacity for both freedom and responsibility. We have the power to make decisions, but we also bear the burden of following through with them. By acknowledging this weight and actively working to resolve it, we can lead more fulfilling lives, free from the shadows of unresolved decisions.
Related Reading
– Immanuel Kant – Groundwork of the Metaphysics of Morals
– Philippa Foot – Virtues and Vices



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